Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
