Small penises have feelings too.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
