It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
