I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
