I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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