you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
