Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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