I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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