I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
