btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
My vagina is officially offended.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
