did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
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