if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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