woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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