I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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