You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
