it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
And the cops told us we were all naked.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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