Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
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