This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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