3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
