We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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