She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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