Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
