he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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