I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I puked a lego.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
