How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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