i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I wish you could order shots online.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
