spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
