garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
