none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Randomize
