You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
