Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
