Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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