school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
