She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
