doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
