if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
