well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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