I'm drive I can fine osifer
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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