You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
