Pants 0. Shit 1.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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