I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
My bed smells like the plague
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
