Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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