shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
