No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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