I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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