it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
What happened to fro yo and sex?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
