I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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