Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
