We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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