Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm jealous of your bromance
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
