dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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